She stood at her favourite spot at the window engrossed in the beauty of the environs. She had snatched these few exclusive moments of peace from her busy day. The regular breath-taking view from her house was even more mesmerising during the rains. Staying in the outskirts of Mumbai was a boon because rain-bathed nature was a treat to watch. Her slender frame and silken complexion complemented the simplicity of her thoughts and actions. Droplets of water played with her waist-length hair, her 29-year-old innocent face lit up every time the wind sprayed the rain towards her.
She was happily drifting into her dream world…
During this season she loved to go for long bike rides and enjoyed challenging the winds while they threatened to throw the bike off-balance. Her laughter would resonate in the air as she opened her arms and looked up at the sky. While the wind while played with her hair she would thank God for the overwhelming feeling of being loved.
….ting tong….ting tong…
Her romantic trail of thoughts was shaken up by the hurried sound of the bell. Her 7-year-old son was back from school. He always threw his things around leaving the mess for her to clean up. She went through her daily scolding routine as she followed him around the house. She hurriedly prepared his snacks and ensured he polished off a sandwich with some milk before he dashed downstairs to play at his friend’s home.
She breathed a sigh of relief and went back to the window.
Today were the first rains and the smell of the wet mud trailed right up to her home. Today, she was so lost in the climate and her thoughts that even routine things were disturbing.
It was on days like these that romance swelled up in her bosom and she felt a queer but satisfying surge of happiness in her mundane life.
She thought to herself about how she would love to go for long drives to a hill-station in such weather. While she spotted waterfalls, animated laughter would ring through the air and soothing ghazals would add melody to the mood. Her heart would be full of a new sense of self, a liberated feeling of being loved.
The sound of crying filled the room and once again her track of thoughts was broken. She rushed to the bedroom. Her 3-year-old son was searching his mamma; he looked comforted when his eyes found her. She fed him some milk and carried him out to the hall, and gave him some toys. She sat beside him on the floor; she was now distanced from the window but still close to her thoughts. Her view restricted to the sky but her thoughts trailed far beyond. Her flight of fantasy took her to the promenade near the sea where the high tide threatened to swallow anyone who was around the shore. Scores of people regularly gathered in bunches and had lots of fun at this place. They would squeal and scream in pure delight when a huge wave drenched them, the rains only added to the fun. She was fascinated by the promenade and how it looked at this time of the year. The smell of hot corn filled the air and her heart was filled with the enchanting feeling of being loved.
She was rudely pushed out of her fantasy when the doorbell rang once again. This time, it was her in-laws, they were back from the temple. She gave a dismal sigh and got up; it would be a while till she got some time to herself. She dutifully greeted her in-laws, cooked a sumptuous meal for everyone, and lovingly fed her family amidst a few fights she sorted between the children. Throughout this humdrum routine, her heart felt warm and a feeling of impending happiness nudged her. After giving her in-laws their medicines, she put her children to sleep and went out to the main door. Her heart was pounding with anticipatory joy while she waited with bated breath. She eagerly stared at the door, this time desperately wanting the doorbell to ring.
Just then the phone bell rang and she happily rushed to pick up the phone. Before she could say anything his quiet voice at the other end said, “Have your dinner and sleep, I will be late again today”
Her heart sank and she felt a dagger pierce through her fantasies. She suddenly realised that her life was just a big long wait….to feel loved…..
Penned by: Mayura Amarkant
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